Online dating email them for
I read your emails, and I get it: you don’t give a shit. When someone starts off saying they’re emailing me again, it’s like I feel bad for ignoring them and thus I pay more attention to them.So what if hot chicks get deluged with awfully mean and awfully written emails – they’re hot chicks. I was a little surprised at your ruthlessness, but hey, I’m a hot chick. (I’m working on a catchphrase here.) This week’s lesson from Olivia is far more practical. When you get a lot of emails, it’s very easy for most of them to just get lost and drowned out, even ones that I liked. I TOULD YOU about the power of the second email months ago, and I’m happy to see Olivia agrees.Unless you consider a mix of the boyish charm of Ryan Gosling with the smokey masculinity of Denzel Washington average.(The ladies call me Denzel Goslington.) In closing, I’d like to thank our lovely Olivia for this very instructive session.She says, even if you don’t find yourself as dreamy as the one you’re seeking – write anyway! Appearance is of course important, but it’s not the defining factor.It’s like there are three groups of people: those you’re immediately attracted to, those you know you’re absolutely never going to be attracted to, and average looking people.I don’t dismiss someone based on his looks, because when you get to know someone, you can become more attracted to them.If someone writes a great, engaging email, but is only average looking, I may still respond.
The “amazing” and “great” ones get responses even if the guy is just average looking. Of course this doesn’t apply to me, I’m not even close to average looking.
I’ve never responded to someone based solely on looks, though it’s difficult to say exactly what will make me decide to respond or not.
It’s a combination of (in order of importance) content of their email, what they look like (whether or not they’re at least somewhat cute enough they could fall into that nondescript “becomes more attractive after getting to know his personality” category), and content of their profile.
I asked her one question, and the response I received was pure gold. When you’ve got a bunch of emails to choose from, it’s pretty hard to select one that, in the one moment it has to advertise, offers only the word “(none)”. So, generally I’ll go back and find their original message, reread their new message, look at their profile, and decide whether to respond. I actually think it’s not a bad idea to send two emails to everyone you write, if you feel like spending that sort of time on Internet dating, and don’t mind veering dangerous close to serial killer zone.
You may think this applies only to men looking for women, or folks trying to attract someone a bit out of their league – but that isn’t so. Most captivating subject line in that assortment goes to…the guy who wrote “86”, I guess? I’ve just gone from spending 10-30 seconds on your email and probably not even looking at your profile to a few minutes thinking about you. But you gotta handle the second email just right (for suggestions, follow the link). A third email is a little too Bates Motel for Olivia’s tastes.